stop giving the disgusting look
before i turn nasty.
bastard.


i don't wanna see anymore pictures.
i trust that you are the healer.
you'll heal him.
like what you did before.
:(
i feel so depressed
but i know he feels worst.
though it has not been concluded but Lord
I TRUST IN YOU.
that nothing will happen to my baby boy.

please take your place.
our existance is simply just to glorify you, the Almighty.


people like me deserve to be a loner
my biaojie whom i was closed to
is no longer close to me
my friends from sec school are dispersed now
only in contact with wenyan.
my friends other than wenyan and all are all guys.
and my boyfriend hate it when i wanna go out with my guy friends
what is his problem
do i look like a machine to him.
i kinda thankful that i'm in nursing.
just keep me occupied and busy.

i don't have many friends.
there are not many people i can talk to.

my boyfriend
the only one i hope to have love from
love me too much.
over protective.
over posessive.
i feel so alone.
i just don't deserve anyone to be there for me
even now i am alone.
i can't rely on anyone.
no one.
i gave all to him.
and this is what i get in return.

tell me what to do.
i'm lost.
i'm sad.
and there's nothing i can do about it.
cos i've already been made believe that i deserve all these.


you took advantage of my patience with you.
really.
people around just like to take advantage when you try to be nice.
yea.

it was a day
a nice day
for me to sleep at home.
i missed my boy.
asked him to come find me after school at bukit panjang starbucks.
he came down
i was happy.
he was upset with the way i talked on the phone with zichee.
i was excited about going F1 with my clique
therefore i was a little loud.
why? i made you ambarrassed by talking loudly?
are you ambarrassed to be with me?
i am who i am
i talk like that
accept it or just forget about it.

i was surprisingly patient with him tonight.
i was shocked that i could be so patient.
but sadly
he just took advantage of it.
no body will understand
all i wanted was a nice time with him. just looking at him made me happy.
BUT wtf, HE IS SO HARD TO PLEASE.

and now he say he will just f off.
i don't know what is his problem now.
i am probably his problem.

this is my secret from now on.
i would let anyone know.

.
.

please.
it's torturing.
sigh.


RUINED
TOTALLY RUINED.
it started with a bang
it ended with a bigger bang.
thanks so much for today.
happy 7months.


HI TO ALL GOOD OLD FRIENDS
whom i havent met since don't know when.

hey people do date me soon.
i'll be off for VERY LONG TERM ATTACHMENT
starting august 25th.

soon..
i'll be kinda busy from then
all the way till next year roughly around feb.

miss you people. :)
LOVE.


i miss you
you were so proud of me, being a nurse.
therefore i take pride as a nurse.
you are my support.
you educate me, though by the hard way.
as i think back.
i want to thank you. for what you've done
for who you are.
you've impact me greatly.
sometimes i felt your presence
it was so strong that it was as though you are still here with me.
hugging me so tightly in your small built arms.
reaching out to my face, with a sweet smile.
the sweetest smile to me.
it is sad to know that you're gone for now.
i'm gonna graduate soon.
and i want you to be proud of me. :)
becos i know you'll be glad knowing that i'm doing something to help others.
i miss the times, fetching you to church.
sending you home from church.
walking you up back home.
i truly miss you.

it was just too sudden.
i still can't believe you're gone.
..

:(